One minor irritation I have is people conflating being discreet with being in the closet. While these two are related terms, they are not synonymous. Being in the closet pertains to whether other people know your sexual orientation, meaning whether you (or others) have disclosed that you aren't straight. Being out is the opposite of being in the closet. The key idea here is other people's knowledge of your orientation. Also, you can be in the closet with some people (like your family) or out to others (like your best friend). "Coming out" is the act of voluntarily disclosing to others of your homosexuality/bisexuality while "outing" is the disclosure by others of your sexuality against your will. (Outing is a whole different ethical issue altogether, and maybe fit for another blog post in the future.)
On the other hand, being discreet is all about your behavior. According to the American Heritage Dictionary, being discreet is "marked by, exercising, or showing prudence and wise self-restraint in speech and behavior; [being] circumspect." So discretion is all about your behavior while being closeted is all about other people's knowledge of your orientation. That's a very fine distinction. Being discreet has nothing to do with whether you are in the closet or out. (Additionally, your discreet behavior is also different, though related, from your mannerisms, which is what being masculine or effeminate is all about.)
There are many people out there who mistake discretion with being in the closet. Of course, if you want to maintain your closeted state, you certainly need to be discreet, but it doesn't necessarily mean that if you're not being discreet then you're already out or if you're out, then you aren't discreet anymore. I am out to several friends, but does that mean I can't be discreet in my activities anymore? Also, I've been to gay places in Malate, but does that mean I'm no longer in the closet or indiscreet?
There are many levels to being closeted and it is merely a function of how many people know about you. Being publicly out means that practically everyone knows that you are gay. Likewise, there are also many shades to being discreet. You can be the ultra-paranoid discreet guy who only goes on one-on-one EBs and will never show your pictures online, saying instead "just meet me na lang." Or you can be the relaxed discreet guy who refrains from holding hands with another guy in public but still goes to gay saunas and clubs.
How much you are out and how discreet you are is entirely up to you. You choose which people you want to come out to and you also choose how much to be discreet in public. So it's a mistake to ask in chat for EBs saying "discreet only" or "discreet here for same" and then later rejecting a guy because he doesn't fit your standards of discretion.
Photo from the Kurt Löwenstein Educational Center at Flickr.