On Valentine’s

So, what are your plans for today, Valentine’s Day? Me, I’ll just stay at home since I have no one to spend it with. And it has been that way for years now. Being single has its ups and downs. On one hand, when you’re single, you are free to go out and socialize, go wherever without having to ask anyone’s permission, and to go to bathhouses, clubs and bars without feeling guilty. On the other hand, having someone there to shower your affection on, someone to talk to about your problems—or to console when he has problems—and someone to spend the night with are also wonderful. Such thoughts of being single or committed naturally arise whenever this day of hearts comes.

However, it’s a good thing that I’m not quite sentimental with dates on a calendar. I don’t get depressed when my birthday is coming up (because I’m getting older), or excited to receive presents come Christmas Day, or lonely when I’m not with someone on Valentine’s. I don’t even feel the need to celebrate the tongue-in-cheek holiday today called Single’s Awareness Day (or SAD) to justify my singlehood.

Anyway, I’ve always thought about how Valentine’s Day is celebrated by discreet (and maybe even paranoid) gay couples. I imagine that such couples would avoid having dates on Valentine’s for the simple reason that they don’t want other people to think that they are an item (not to mention the hassle of reserving seats in a restaurant, or getting movie tickets, or booking a motel , or the traffic). Let’s face it, if you see two guys having dinner at a fancy restaurant on Valentine’s Day, you’d automatically think that these two are a couple or are dating. This is not two people in a business meeting, or two best friends doing bromantic dinner. This is a couple on a date!

Some straight men celebrate Valentine’s with their significant second other on either February 13 or 15 (and motels reportedly have better business on those two dates than on Valentine’s itself). I think that closeted gay couples would also avoid those two dates for the same reason.

I guess the point I’m saying is that Valentine’s Day is really not a holiday for discreet PLU couples. Unless, you celebrate it at home, which is quite corny. Until such time that gay relationships are accepted in mainstream society, I guess there will be no equivalent to Valentine’s, the way it is traditionally celebrated, for most PLU couples. Well, gay guys in a relationship do not actually need to celebrate Valentine’s but if they want to celebrate it like straight people do, then they just have to be creative.